Deck 7: A: Developing and Maintaining Relationships

Question 1

Describe the elements of interpersonal attraction that influence our decision whether or not to develop an interpersonal relationship with another person. How have communication technologies and mobility changed the way these elements function? Reflecting on what you've learned about intergroup contact theory, why might we say it is a good thing that these changes have taken place? Provide a narrative example to illustrate how these factors influenced your choice to form one of your close friendships or romantic relationships.

Answer 1

Ideal answers will identify and discuss proximity, physical attraction, and similarity as important influences on whether we perceive another person to be attractive as a relational partner. Strong answers will also identify how communication technologies and online communication have changed how these three elements influence attraction by de-emphasizing physical appearance, creating virtual proximity, and helping people with uncommon interests find others who are similar to themselves. Additionally, our greater mobility today means most of us will encounter (proximity) greater numbers of people as well as a more diverse group of potential relational partners. This is a good thing, culturally, because intergroup contact theory suggests that interacting with people from different backgrounds helps a person to understand his or her own culture better as well as to be able to understand others better. The examples provided will vary but should reflect an understanding of each attraction element.

Question 2

How do the partners in a relationship use communication to reduce uncertainty? Use one of your own experiences or a hypothetical narrative example to illustrate how one or both partners would use specific communication strategies to reduce their level of uncertainty.

Answer 2

Ideal answers will identify and explain the monitoring, proactive, and indirect strategies for reducing uncertainty discussed in the textbook. Strong answers might also synthesize a discussion of self-disclosure as a tool for moving a relationship toward intimacy by giving our relational partners deeper information with which to make predictions about our behavior and increase the chances they will feel comfortable interacting with us. The examples students share will vary but should reflect clear understanding of and the ability to distinguish between different strategies.

Question 3

In what ways are online relationships similar to and different from face-to-face relationships? Considering what you have learned about both hyperpersonal communication as well as the importance of self-disclosure, what recommendations do you have for people who are engaging in online communication to ensure they develop the healthy relationships they desire?

Answer 3

Ideal answers will recognize that online relationships typically develop similarly to the way face-to-face relationships do. Strong answers will discuss both the new opportunities the medium offers for us to communicate with people who are not physically present and how the limitations of the channel create challenges to the communication process and to our perception of the other person. Specific attention should be given to the topics of self-disclosure and how online communication may influence our perception of topic appropriateness, as well as to strategies for managing private information and avoiding inappropriate topics.

Question 4

What role does self-disclosure play in the development and maintenance of an interpersonal relationship? Discuss the ways that inappropriate disclosure might hinder the relationship as well as how appropriate disclosure enhances the relationship.

Question 5

Using one of your own terminated or reconciled relationships-either a friendship or a romantic relationship-discuss its progression through the stages of relationship development from initiation through termination. Provide specific examples to illustrate the types of interpersonal communication that were common in each stage.

Question 6

Lilly and her significant other have been having trouble lately. She had hoped that they were just going through a rough patch, but now she's starting to wonder if their relationship is, indeed, in serious decline. What tactics can Lilly use to repair her relationship? Make sure to explain each strategy and provide concrete examples to illustrate your ideas.

Question 7

How does developing and maintaining strong interpersonal relationships enhance the quality of our lives?

Question 8

One of your friends has recently dissolved her marriage. Your friend and her spouse have one child, and your friend sincerely hopes that the two of them can repair the relationship. Synthesizing what you have learned throughout this chapter, what would you explain to your friend to help her understand the role communication might play in the redefining and repairing of her relationship? Considering that your friend has a child, what additional advice might you have for her?
Answer Key

Question 9

Explain the challenge that the three dialectical tensions discussed in the textbook present within an interpersonal relationship. Provide a real example from your own observation to illustrate the strain of each dialectical tension, and offer suggestions for what the couple could do to resolve the challenge.

Question 10

You have learned that while effective communication can enhance relationships, ineffective or inappropriate communication can hinder or even destroy a relationship. Synthesizing what you have learned from this chapter and others, provide advice about what relational partners should and should not do in each stage of relationship development from initiation through the declining stage.